The Matrix versus Inception - our table stood divided at two all. The waitress was the deciding vote. Which would she choose? I handed her the tip, whispering Matrix, Matrix, Matrix, under my breath. “Inception. No doubt about it,” she answered. Considering the decade that has spanned between the films, you would be forgiven for thinking that the Matrix is a sci-fi film from a different generation to Inception and therefore incomparable, but you’d be wrong. Indeed when writer and director of the film Christopher Nolan was asked in a recent LA Times article whether or not Inception would be another second-life film akin to Avatar and Surrogates, he responded, "I think ours is of an older school ... more of The Matrix variety and the concepts of different levels of reality.” This comparison is not just a testament to the enduring quality of the Wachowski brothers’ trail-blazing 90’s film, but it is also a reflection of a similarly original concept and revolutionary effects in Inception. In both films we are Alice falling down the rabbit hole into metaphysical worlds of Neitsche and Jung, worlds where the very existence of reality is questioned and the boundaries between what is our perceived reality and what is actually real are blurred. The same overarching question is asked- which is better- living in ignorance in a false reality or surviving in the harsh real world? There is a common focus on an awakening of the human condition- a realisation that we have lost touch with reality, living our lives through devices rather than real interactions. The protagonists in both films straddle the boundaries between reality and fiction and between good and evil. Neo a hacker and Cobb an idea thief- are both dubious characters, on the fringes of society. But which is film is better? Cinematography: 1-0 to Inception. Both are beautifully shot and contain effects considered revolutionary for their time-‘bullet time’ in the Matrix and a CGI folding of Paris like a two dimensional map in Inception. We could argue that many of the special effects that make Inception visual eye-candy would not have been available around the time the Matrix was filmed which would make the two films visually incomparable. However, Nolan’s use of ‘practical methods’ wherever possible, the revolving hotel corridor scene used a set on steel I beam rings connected to electric motors with the actors on wires, make the film exceptional without extensive use of CGI. Script: 2-0 to Inception. The Matrix contains some of the most prolific lines in film history so much so that they have been parodied and imitated endlessly since its release. However, watching it last night, ten years later, I couldn’t help but giggle at some of the lines. There are scenes in which Keanu thinks out loud and lines such as ‘I know kung fu’ said in the inimitable way only Surfer-accented Reeves can, that date the film. The soundtrack doesn’t help either. While Inception contains conversations reminiscent of seminal moments from the Matrix (Cobb compares ideas to viruses in the same way Agent Smith compares humans to viruses) it does not fall into the cheesy one-liners sci-fi trap and contains momentous lines including the train riddle that are almost lyrical in their employ. And a killer soundtrack to boot. Plot: Inception-2, The Matrix-1. When Nolan created the idea of dream architects and an idea heist, he invented a world that is based in something we all know. While the Matrix is set in a futuristic world that has no real basis in our reality, Inception feeds off the idea that we all dream; we all know what it is to be dreaming- concepts such as dying in a dream causing you to wake up are well observed and cleverly placed into the storyline. This unites the audience. However, many other aspects of dreaming aren’t even considered. Nolan picks and chooses which aspects fit the storyline. While dreams bring the audience together, they also work against the believability of the film. We all dream in different ways and no one can truly depict what it is like to be in another’s dream. Add different dream layers to the mix and the complexity can overwhelm the viewer. Perhaps the quick pace of the film can deceive them as they watch, but afterwards they are left unsatisfied with the explanations they have been given. The Matrix, on the other hand, is a seamless film, both cinematically and in its linear story. It creates a battle between good and evil, computers versus humans and simplifies a complex sci-fi concept. The trade-off we are faced with is between imperfect complexity and flawless simplicity. The winner is... Only one movie has managed to include a complex emotional storyline into a sci-fi plot. Regardless of its flaws, Inception recreates the question we have all asked ourselves at some point: Is this really happening or am I dreaming? And, to be fair, only one film hasn’t been tainted by straight-to-DVD quality sequels. Inception wins. For now.

Most of us are film-watchers. We love commenting on and reviewing every movie we see. However, locally-made movies seem to suffer from a set of idiosyncrasies which can observed in nearly all Lollywood films. Singing Songs are the soul of a film. No movie is a hit without good songs, right? It logically follows that if one can’t sing well, he or she is incapable of being a good hero/heroine/lover.  The ordinary-looking poor girl knows the ragas, sur and taal of music so well that even a qualified singer couldn’t hold a candle to her. Where do these people pick up the ability to sing like professionals? Playing the piano You’ll find a man from a poor family who is struggling to support his relatives, playing the piano wonderfully. When did he get the time to learn? Where exactly did he get the money to buy a piano and pay for lessons? Mental telepathy People in films need to have mental telepathy with their lovers. They need to know exactly when their lovers will break into song, so that they can complete the verse. Not only can lovers keep track of what their other half is doing at all times, they also know what the next line of their partner’s song will be. Rain scenes The drenched couple never catches a cold. Rain scenes should be used to advertise drugs for the flu and common cold. Although couples will spend hours singing songs and dancing in the rain, they will never so much as sneeze. Perhaps they should share their secret with ordinary people who want relief from respiratory illnesses. Beautiful, terminally ill patients The heroine is often on her death bed. The doctor diagnosed her as critically ill. She wears perfect makeup, her hair is straightened and she has no dark circles. Although she has lung cancer, it doesn’t prevent her from lustily singing in memory of her hero. Somehow, this doesn’t hurt her weak lungs. Makeovers in the jungle Lollywood loves scenes where couples are alone in the jungle. The heroine will be wearing a new dress for each shot, with fresh makeup and a new set of jewelry. Who straightens her hair, who irons her dresses, and who cooks her food? Why does she look so fresh even though she's supposedly been starving for days? Dancing in the fields - with no repercussions In a country like ours, where we see so many cases of honor killing, somehow traditional girls can sing and dance in the fields without anybody batting an eyelid. Somehow, nobody kills or even notices her for it.  Apparently, we are very liberal and progressive - or at least that’s what the film industry would have us believe. Girls in short skirts perform vulgar dances and seduce men in public, in places where other women don’t even dare venture. And then we wonder why our films always flop.

Amidst a plethora of job applications, I decided to take a break and treat myself to a no-brainer movie. It was not much of an endeavor to pick a Bollywood movie for the purpose. I found myself playing Dabangg on my DVD and what a treat it was. Despite taking a break of a couple of years from Bollywood, to my utter amusement, I discovered that Bollywood movies have not changed much. The story line of most movies is the same, where a man is either a gangster or a corrupt official with his own sense of justice and his own way of accomplishing it. It brought back memories of Gangster, Khal Nayak and the like. The winning formula of such stories is to base it on the life of a gangster or rebel with no sense of respect for law. This gains brownie points among the fan-followers of such reel heroes, who are not only from the uneducated but also the educated class, who then copy the attitude and persona these reel-heroes portray in the screen in real life situations. Corruption, justice and gaalis - now that's entertainment It has always intrigued me as to how these movies are supposed to positively influence our masses and after watching Dabangg I could not resist the urge to pen my thoughts. One of the most disturbing aspects was the foul language used in the movie. Does this mass media ‘cinema’ want to show that abusive language is somehow cool? But the worst was yet to come. I wonder as to how they even come up with such bizarre plots where the “hero” is a bad guy in this movie. Chulbul Pandey (Salman Khan) is shown as a corrupt policeman, satisfying his conscience with his own sense of justice. If any readers had the misfortune to go through this torture, they would not have missed especially one baloney scene where Pandey pardons a criminal just because he has a girlfriend. So much for art and quality entertainment. Why does it matter after all? Bollywood movies have a huge market in Pakistan and majority of our people depend on these movies for entertainment. However, such gibberish movies are quite unhealthy for our society; let me try to clarify why. To quote one example, tobacco sales have been proven to have shot up after people watched war movies showing physically fit men smoking cigarettes while making crucial decisions.  Many a time, producers and directors also put the use of drugs into their movies to make them enjoyable or “cool.” It didn’t matter that they were corrupting and manipulating the masses without even knowing it-or did they? Similarly, by showing that somehow rebels and criminals are “cool” as long as they satisfy certain standards of “good,” the cinema is indirectly promoting and encouraging the mafia culture. The entire picture is flawed to begin with, because it preaches that as the system has failed to provide for everyone, unjust means of attaining your goals as long as they serve your ends is “cool”. Instead of correcting the overall system, one can join them and then serve his ‘own’ sense of justice by hook or crook. Is this the message we want to give out to our people? Setting such examples is unhealthy socially, economically and politically. Small mafia groups and drug lords have strong roots in many parts of Pakistan and the situation becomes worse when the media portrays such acts as “cool” and such people to be heroes. Lights, camera... socialization There is no denying that poverty, illiteracy and unemployment should be factored into this discourse, but cinema has long hidden in the shadows and needs to acknowledge its share of blame. Such movies have a destructive impact on our society, especially when the majority of the audience consists of illiterate and young people, who are highly impressionable. These people are highly influenced by this mass media and try to imitate such acts in real life. Such movies influence impressionable minds, as people act and dress as they see and are incapable of separating the wheat from the chaff. Movies have now been around for more than a century and they will continue to impact us and future generations. The purpose of cinema should be to entertain, educate and benefit its audience, rather than defining universal wrongs as okay. People watch movies to break from the monotony of their routine life and it should have a good influence on them.  It can aid visual learning by imparting education and quality entertainment by depicting the realities of life and showing the evils of society to make people understand life better.

The Golden Globes are unique in that they represent both worlds of television and motion pictures in a relatively intimate affair with round table dining and champagne, leading to some movie and TV stars exhibiting, shall we say, more entertaining behaviour than at other black tie events. Here, pre-Oscar accolades are awarded to outstanding film categories, and post-Emmy recognition is given to the finest in television.  The Globes are also about fashion on the scale of fairytales—dramatic couture, dazzling diamonds, gowns with trains, upswept hair, exquisite shoes, beautiful clutches, all worn by some of the western world’s most captivating actors. When it comes to Hollywood, the red carpet is every bit as interesting as an awards ceremony itself. This is where fashion houses and jewelers vie to be worn by A-list celebrities; where stylists’ careers are made or ended; where fashion magazines pick up trends and the high street begins its knock-offs; and where viewers see tinsel town at its best—and, in some cases, at its most bizarre. Best Dressed: 1.Olivia Wilde (Tron: Legacy) dazzled in sparkly Marchesa. 2.Jane Fonda looked fabulous and fifty years younger in sequined black. 3. Anne Hathaway glistened in champagne sequined Armani Prive. 4. Sandra Bullock looked chic in flowy Jenny Packham. 5. Scarlett Johanssen evoked old Hollywood in a pretty Elie Saab. Most Disappointing: Unfortunate choices for the evening included Romona Keveza’s designs on Jennifer Love Hewitt (a ludicrous baby blue confection) and on red-haired bombshell Christina Hendricks’ red bomb of a dress; Julianne Moore in a uni-sleeved fuschia Lanvin; Claire Danes (winner for Best Actress in a TV Series or TV Movie) in a custom-made candy-pink Calvin Klein that only elongated her already-long torso; and Halle Berry in a black corset-and-train disaster by Nina Ricci. Most Figure-Flattering: Curves were amplified and waistlines defined by clever choices made by Sofia Vargara in scarlet Vera Wang; January Jones in a daring red Versace that was the only overt cleavage-barer of the evening; Eva Longoria in exquisitely tailored black Zac Posen; and Christina Aguilera in beaded Zuhair Murad. Most Eccentric: Unsurprisingly, Helena Bonham Carter won this one hands down in a whimsical Vivienne Westwood that recalled 80’s-era Madonna, wearing a red shoe on one foot and a green shoe on the other; Annette Bening (Best Actress in a Comedy/Musical Motion Picture winner) unnecessarily wanted to be taken seriously in a Tom Ford outfit with glasses and spiky hair. Most Blah: These ladies normally look striking, but their choice of white lent a ghoulish hue to their complexions this year: Tilda Swinton (in a white shirt with an unflattering off-white skirt, both by Jill Sander); Nicole Kidman (in a bland Prada design); Jennifer Lopez (in sparkly white Zuhair Murad with unfortunate white eyeshadow and too-pale lipstick); Leighton Meester (in pale beige schoolmarm Burberry); and Megan Fox (skeletal in soft pink Armani Prive). Biggest Bling: The biggest rocks on display this year were on the $1.6 million diamond Cartier necklace worn by Dame Helen Mirren. Mirren carried off the necklace without letting it overwhelm her, and, true to form, wisely covered her upper arms in sheer fabric as part of her delicate Badgeley Mischka ensemble. Best Backrest: Angie Jo made up for her lack of statement jewelry with her favourite accessory in the form of Brad Pitt—Mr. Pitt’s form also provided a useful backrest while the duo were seated. Single-tastic: Newly-single starlets included Sandra Bullock, Scarlett Johanssen, Christina Aguilera and Eva Longoria, all looking noticeably more glamorous than they did a few months ago when they were still married. Coincidence or extra effort? Best Bump-Coverage: Every awards season invariably includes a notable pregnant actress nominee; this year its Natalie Portman, Best Actress in a Motion Picture—Drama winner for Black Swan, whose light pink Viktor & Rolf dress draped elegantly over her sizable bump and diverted the viewers’ gaze upward to a sparkly red flower on her bosom that matched her lipstick, clutch and shoes. Runner up: equally pregnant Jane Krakowski of 30 Rock in a pretty, billowing blue gown. Top "Yes-they’re-human" Moments: Angelina caught on camera applying lip gloss; Eva Longoria stumbling twice in a row to prevent herself from falling on stage in sky-high heels; Mrs. Downey Jr. smiling mechanically in Just-Wait-Till-We-Get-Home mode while her husband made jokes about sleeping with all the Best Actress nominees. Blame it on the Moet (or not).

Quite often I have noticed veteran directors, producers and actors from our local film industry on television screens complaining that Pakistani cinemas are greatly occupied with foreign films, further alleging that this has denied their own films’ access to local audiences. I personally feel that their attitude does not reflect a positive approach towards the issue of our diminishing film industry. By vehemently pressing for a ban on the screening of foreign films in Pakistani cinemas, they, rather than trying to raise their bars in terms of quality, are actually conceding to the fact that their films cannot compete on an international level. They often claim the lack of finances and technical expertise to be the prime causes for the downfall of Pakistani cinema. However, in my opinion the actual cause is lack of sincerity towards the art. The deficiency in innovative stories, quality acting and engaging screenplays do not always require huge sums of money or technical expertise – all that is needed is consistent effort and a bit of natural talent, which these ‘veterans’ have deliberately refused to explore, by sticking to conventional filmmaking formulae preventing them from progressing. However, all is not lost. The slow but significant evolution of independent filmmakers in Pakistan continues to thrive on low budgets (quite often a few cameras and some free actors), unaffected by competition, with one pursuit in mind – to get their ideas and work recognised. These people don’t even complain about the promotion and projection of their work and rather adhere to a ‘do it yourself’ approach. They have successfully garnered a small, but significant following. While the world is unfolding in terms of exchanging art (for instance, Hollywood making investments in India), with promotional campaigns of films going online, the demand to ban foreign films sounds ridiculous. The Pakistani film industry does not need to compete. I believe it can co-exist on a smaller scale. What it needs to focus on is quality and innovation and once it finds a following, it can evolve and expand respectively. Till then … ‘veterans’ … quit whining and start working!

In the 60s, Shabab and Evernew studios were considered the two best film studios in Lollywood. Any director in Lahore would want to shoot his films there. Like many legends of that era, the beautiful Shabnam also spent most of her time shooting at these locations. After 14 years, Shabnam returned to Pakistan last month. Although Shahab no longer exists and Evernew is not what it used to be, Shabnam’s fans were keen to have one more glimpse of her as she visited her colleagues in Lahore. Film technicians who had worked with Shabnam back in the day described her as a courteous, modest and good-natured lady who was friendly on the film sets. “When Aina was being shot in 1977, she came to Evernew Studio. I was serving as a helper with an assistant at that time,” recalls one such man, now a tailor, who had a chance to meet the legendary actress. “I once spoke to her while serving tea to the artists on the set. She asked us to pray for the success of her film, which later became a huge hit. She wasn't arrogant at all and spoke to us with great respect,” he added. Aina, a Pakistani film from 1977 which starred Shabnam and Nadeem, is said to be the longest running Pakistani film on record. It is also called “Pakistan’s only crown jubilee film” with a total running period of 401 weeks in all cinemas and 48 weeks in the main cinemas in Karachi. The film was a musical success with music composition by Robin Gosh (Shabnam’s husband). The playback singers for the films were Mehdi Hassan, Mehnaz, Alamgir, Nayyara Noor and Akhlaq Ahmed. As I reminisce the golden days with her return to Pakistan, I remember how mesmerising her performance was in this film. The song “Mujhe Dil Se Na Bhulana” shown in the video above is one of the most celebrated songs of Lollywood. Another excellent on-screen performance by Shabnam was in Andleeb. The Shabnam-Waheed Murad on screen duo did wonders at the box office and the film ran continuously for 56 weeks in Karachi. In this film, she performed another timeless hit called “Mere Dil Ki Mehfil”. [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgUuHFW-UhM]] Another song featuring Shabnam that brought two great artists together was “Mili Gul Ko Khushboo” sung by Runa Laila for Shabnam in Naseeb Apna Apna - a black and white film from the 70s directed by Qamar Zaidi and produced by Waheed Murad. [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mfOBkGGoIts]] I can safely say that Shabnam has been an inspiration for the whole generation - there are over 150 films to her credit, dozens of which are unmatched in Lollywood. While artists in Lahore’s old studios eagerly waited for her visit, she said herself that she might not find those places to be the same as before. Shabnam’s last film was released some two decades ago; things have changed dramatically for the worse in Lollywood since then. However, I am positive after hearing her say that she will try her best to contribute something to Lollywood. The hope in my heart to see this Lollywood queen on the silver screen again has been rekindled. Will we get to see the talented Shabnam in Pakistani movies like Khuda Ke Liye and Bol? I surely hope so! Read more by Ali here. Correction: An earlier version of this post incorrectly stated that Shabnam performed in the song "Mein Jis Din Bhula Doon Tera Pyar". The error is regretted.

Last year,  Pakistan Telecommunication Authority (PTA), following the directions given by our government, blocked over 1,600 words on SMS that were unethical or against the wider interest of our nation. Later, PTA blocked Twitter over blasphemous tweets for one day. PTA took such admirable action when it came to national interest, or shall we say our beloved government's interest. Having said as much, I believe that the quality of programs aired on TV channels nowadays is far more poisonous than these banned words. For the last couple of days whenever I switch my television on, I find myself looking at either a commercial or some talk show in which Dolly Bindra - an Indian actress - is liberally abusing Veena Malik without even a hint of hesitation. What is even more appalling is that our Pakistani hosts are amused by her disparaging commentary regarding the Pakistani actress. Not once have I seen the hosts demand proof about her allegations on Veena's character or actions that Bindra so openly criticises. A few days ago, a music channel broadcasted a commercial in which Dolly Bindra was heard saying,

 Lakh de lannat ho Veena pay. (A thousand curses upon Veena)

Veena Malik was roaming here and there in the studio for three hours without clothes.

I am a big fan of Pakistani movies, and I am not embarrassed in the slightest to admit to this. However, for the past few years - like a decade or so - I have not come across many quality movies in terms of script, performance and concept. Khuda Ke Liye, Bol, Yeh Dil Aapka hua and few other movies were technically sound and showcased strong scripts and some impressive performances. The rest,  and I say this with deep regret, were typical in that they offered no quality content to the audience. A few days ago, I was enlightened about the trailer of Naach - a joint venture by Nasir Teherani and Manduck Collective Films. [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSvCvjjyLvI]] It came as a complete surprise to me to watch a few of our finest actors delivering some great dialogues. I must add here that the Pakistani film industry once had amazingly potent dialogues back in the 60’s up till the early 90’s, but after this, they just fell flat. With Naach, I am hoping to see a revival in good dialogue. This movie will be the first ever to embark on a genre exploring the performing arts in Pakistan. It showcases the talents of Javed Sheikh, Shaan, Momal Sheikh, Noman Butt and Komal Rizvi, along with many other glittering stars. This movie is based on passion, dance, romance, inspiration and imagination. I am truly excited to see what is in store for us! The trailer of the movie itself is very appealing and interesting. It builds up the curiosity for the movie – which in itself is a generous victory for our film industry. Let us not dwell  over the debate over the originality of the concept or its inspirational adaptation. Just consider this movie as a move towards a brighter future for our cinema. Javed Sheikh is definitely amongst the finest actors of our country. I have liked him since the days of his television drama  'Shama'. The way he is seen delivering his dialogues in Naach is commendable; his voice and his gestures will undoubtedly impress you the way they have managed to impress me. Moving on, Shaan, I find is the most sensible actors that we have ever had. He has, undoubtedly done a remarkable job in maintaining and increasing the viewer-ship of Pakistani films. Whether it was Guns N Roses, Very Good Dunya Very Bad Log, Tere Pyar Mein, Ghoonghat, Khuda Ke Liye or Moosa Khan, Shaan has always tried to give a well composed and genuine performance as per his character's requirement. It is a shame that Pakistani directors fail to offer him roles that reflect his true calibre as an actor. Many will question the choice of mature and older actors like Shaan and Javed Sheikh in a movie about dance without once thinking that these actors actually have substance in their acting and are well versed in what they do. Why is that we didn't question Shah Rukh Khan's role as a hockey coach for a women's team? Aren't Al Pacino and Richard Gere still acting and taking up challenging roles? It is because these "old" and "mature" actors have way more experience and versatility than the few younger ones whose looks are more potent than their acting skills. To all those critics my humble advice is to try promoting Pakistani films especially when they are worthy of praise. It is our responsibility to help restore, respect and honour our film industry, especially when our country needs an avenue where Pakistan can be seen under a more positive light. I am ardently looking forward to this movie, and I hope those who appreciate quality movies stemming from Pakistani cinema are feel the same way. Read more by Shafiq here, or follow him on Twitter @shafiqulhasan81

Superstars have a persona so larger than life that we seem to forget that they are but mortals and they too will depart from the world like every other human being. It is the end of an era. On Wednesday, Bollywood’s original superstar Rajesh Khanna died at the age of 69 in his Mumbai residence after prolonged illness. As the world grieved his loss, the phrase “Bollywood’s first superstar” became the buzzword for all the obituaries in local, Indian and foreign media.

“I understand that he was a big, big star but how is he the first superstar?” asked a Bollywood aficionado friend of mine. “What about Raj Kapoor, Dilip Kumar and Dev Anand? Weren’t they superstars? And their time was before Rajesh Khanna’s! Just because the term became popular during his [Khanna] time doesn’t mean we should discredit his predecessors.”

“Ae Babu Moshai, zindagi aur maut uparwale ke haath hai jahan-panah. Usse na aap badal sakte hain na main.” “Pushpa, I hate tears.” “Kisi badi khushi ke intezaar mein hum yeh chote chote khushiyoon ke mauqay kho dete hain.”

Indra Kumar followed a simple formula for success  back in the 90s. Typically, the first half of his films would be based on comedy, while the second half would be a tear jerker. David Dhawan followed a similar approach in some of his films. Additionally films like Dil, Ishq and Shola aur Shabnam were along the same lines. Karan Johar with his Kuch Kuch Hota Hai and Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham improvised on the same formula. We can find similarities with Priyadarshan’s brand of humor as well. Then, on the turn of the millennium, Raju Hirani took this method to a whole new level. In both his Munna Bhai films as well as in 3 Idiots, Raju took the audience through an emotional roller coaster ride where there was no plausible interval between comic sequences and emotional drama. One moment, his audience would be laughing non-stop and the next moment they would be overcome by heartfelt sentiment. Mrigdeep Singh Lamba’s Fukrey has mirrored the style established by Raju Hirani. There are multiple moments in the film where you have not fully recovered from your laughter when a new development in the story leaves your mind reeling with emotion. Having said that, like the predecessors of this method, Fukrey is  primarily a comedy film, something like Delhi Belly with a Punjabi touch. Fukrey revolves around four guys, not necessarily friends, but trapped together in some interesting (read: tricky) situations. Humor ensues and they eventually conquer the challenges faced, predictably so. While the basic premise has nothing new to offer, it is the underlying tones in the script and treatment of the screenplay that distinguish the film. Fukrey does not offer a perfect protagonist like 'Rancho' of 3 Idiots. To the contrary, the heroes are weak individuals  looking for shortcuts in life. They have no money, they can’t study and they are willing to cheat their way into a college admission. While the film follows the tried and tested mix of several directors, Fukrey neither bores the audience, nor does it seem repetitive. The charm of Fukrey is boosted by its committed cast. The characters are detailed and fun. 'Bholi Punjaban', for example, carries a dappled personality: she is narcissistic and foul-mouthed with a 'Sindrella' tattoo on her neck. Meanwhile, the college watchman 'Pandit' - a kind, soft spoken yet corrupt guy, leaks exam papers, seeking backdoor registration for unqualified students in exchange for money. Both Richa Chadda and Pankaj Tripathi have handled their roles splendidly. Seeing Richa in a purely comic role after her intense acting in Gangs of Wasseypur was a joy. Similarly, Pankaj Triptahi’s role was a complete contrast to his performance in Gangs of Wasseypur, showing his adaptability as an actor. The four protagonists of the film are also well-selected. While Ali Fazal as 'Zafar' is relatively unimpressive, the other three leads are hilarious. Pulkit Samrat, being the smart wizard, reminds you of 'Amar' from Andaz Apna Apna or 'Raju' of Hera Pheri - good at heart but willing to make easy money through shady means. Pulkit’s comic timing is spectacular and his chemistry with 'Choocha' is excellent. 'Choocha' on the other hand is a cross between 'Zach Galfianikis' of Hangover and 'Babu Bhaiyya' of Hera Pheri. He is spectacular when it comes to dreaming the lottery results but a certified idiot in all other respects. Still, he surprises you when it comes to his survival instincts. His scenes with Richa Chadda are utterly hilarious. Manjot Singh is also enjoyable in his role as 'Sardar Ji'. He portrays a nice guy who does not want to charge people who eat at his father’s shop yet wishes for admission into a college without having to study for it. He swears that he will teach a lesson to his cheating girlfriend but ends up waving and smiling at her. In the first fifteen minutes of the film, I thought that Fukrey will offer several smiles but fall short of making me laugh. I spent the next hour and a half laughing uncontrollably at the characters' antics. I highly recommended watching Fukrey! Read more by Sami here, or follow him on Twitter @SamiSaayer

Released internationally as Seedlings, Lamha is the fourth Pakistani film to hit the cinemas this year. I should admit that I do not usually watch films like Lamha as I prefer madcap comedies and optimistic films more. However, watching Lamha the other day reminded me of a wonderful Mexican film, Amores Perros, which has certain qualities in common with the new Pakistani film.  One of the many narratives in Amores Perros involves a married couple who are clearly going through a rough phase. In Lamha, instead of showing a Pakistani drama type shouting match, the director explores the tension between the two through silence on the dinner table — plates being passed firmly, teacups being put down forcefully with hasty glances being exchanged. It is this subtlety that characterises Lamha, which revolves around the aftermath of a tragic event that has befallen Mohib Mirza (Raza) and Aaminah Shaikh (Maliha). The said tragedy leads to a transformation of the intimacy between the protagonists into an increasing distance, as they choose separate ways to deal with grief. Unable to support one another, despite the shared loss, the sentiments of anger, grief and incomprehension are shown beautifully by director Mansoor Mujahid. Mujahid chooses little props like a misplaced crayon, or the unexpected hearing of a loved one's name to portray the characters' guilt and isolation. Other than those moments, the film's highlights include a spectacular closing shot that matches the mood of the characters perfectly; an argument between the leading pair that triggered spontaneous applause and a wonderful Ghazal. In its own appropriately subtle manner, Lamha tells a heartfelt story without the theatrics we're used to seeing in lesser films. If you have ever lost someone and have been reminded of them from the little things around you, you'll certainly appreciate the best of this film. You'll also likely be comforted by a lovely line in the movie which goes something like:

'It's the pain that reminds you that they're still with you.'

In the last few months, screenings of movies with a strong Pakistani connection has surged in the United States. It has been culturally very exciting and rewarding to watch these fantastic films and afterwards attend interactive sessions with their directors and crew-members.  Saving Face, These Birds Walk, Without Shepherd, The Waves, Night Life, Lamha (Seedlings), The Reluctant Fundamentalist, Zinda Bhaag, Torn, Wounds of Waziristan, Good Morning Karachi and Anima State were presented at different film festivals in the United States. A few also went into commercial distribution. While movies like Waar and Main Hoon Shahid Afridi did create a buzz in the Pakistani cinema market, most of the internationally released movies were overlooked by the mainstream Pakistani media. What is the reason behind this phenomenon of about a dozen Pakistani independent movies suddenly appearing in the US? There are, of course, multiple factors causing this recent surge, but my best guess is that it was influenced the most after Saving Face won the Academy Award (Oscar) for best short movie in early 2012. [embed width="620"]http://vimeo.com/37342298[/embed] An independent process was going on in the creative minds of local and international filmmakers who did not follow Lollywood techniques or the local mindset. These artists, with their unique vision and experimental style, are young and most probably grew up watching Pakistani TV dramas in the 80’s, during its zenith. They have been inspired by high standards of the past but are using the big screen to fight against the inertia of the social and political status quo. These movies cover various genres such as drama, romance, documentary, musical, comedy, tragedy, action and thriller. They also cover a wide variety of emotional topics like poverty, terrorism, corruption, love, peace, wealth, art and cultural heritage. Cultural critics of these movies often object to the negative portrayal of Pakistan, such as the abuse of women, homeless children and terrorism. This criticism often comes from people who have not seen these movies but have only heard or read about them. Like any other area of art and creativity, movies present the view of the director. One may agree or disagree with the message but this should not mean that the director has to present a flowery picture of the country. Saadat Hasan Manto once said,

“If you cannot bear to hear my stories then your society is unbearable.”

Director cum writer, Ali Abbas Zafar waited a couple of years after the release of his debut ‘Mere Brother Ki Dulhan’, a comedy hit of 2011, to entice filmgoers with an action packed crime thriller. This time, Zafar has replaced the genre of a light romantic comedy with a nice mash-up of 70s’ action films to present the perfect commercial movie – Gunday. [embed width="620"]http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x18dlgu_gunday-hd-hindi-movie-official-theatrical-trailer-2014_shortfilms[/embed] If you are a fan of Amitabh Bachchan, particularly of his angry, young man image and classics like Sholay, Don and Kala Pathar, then Gunday is a big treat for you. It’s all about action, double-dealing, revenge tangled with friendship, deceit, romance and betrayal. The film starts with ace actor Irrfan Khan’s opening narration about the fictional story of two refugees, set in the backdrop of the 1971 war between Pakistan and India.

“Bangladesh is born as Pakistan surrenders on December 16 at the end of the India-Pakistan war. It also gave birth to two young orphans; Bikram and Bala. Fighting for survival, they clung to each other and escaped to Calcutta.”

Director Brett Ratner, who has previously directed the Rush Hour trilogy, X-Men: The Last Stand, and Horrible Bosses, brings Hercules, an action-packed movie with Greek muscles written all over it. [embed width="620"]http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x1jounb_hercules-international-trailer_shortfilms[/embed] Pumping the action in the lead role is former World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) superstar, Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson, who is seen clad in leather attire while swinging his swords and clubs at his enemies with Greek conviction. Unlike the Greek mythology, where Hercules is the son of Zeus, the movie doesn’t bode that connection as this time the story is somewhat different. Hercules (Dwayne Johnson) is the leader of the mercenaries and although he is regarded as the demigod son of Zeus, the story portrays him as a human. Nevertheless, it did not bother Hercules for he has acquired training to take down beasts twice his size. Moreover, the story narrates the reason why Hercules became mortal. To know this, the viewers must watch the movie. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="600"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] The story is quite straightforward, where Hercules is asked by Lord Cotys of Thrace (John Hurt) to provide his army with ample training to defend the Thracian Kingdom against Rheseus (Tobias Santelmann). Those following Hercules in his band of mercenary are Amphiaraus (Ian McShane), Autolycus (Rufus Sewell), Tydeus (Aksel Hennie), Atalanta (Ingrid Bolso Berdal) and  Iolaus (Reece Ritchie). All are experts in particular domains of warfare. Iolaus, however, is Hercules’ nephew and the one who narrates the story. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="593"] Still of Rufus Sewell, Aksel Hennie, Dwayne Johnson, Ingrid Bolso Berdal and Reece Ritchie. Photo: IMDb[/caption] To keep the story simple, the narrative explains that Hercules did complete the Twelve Labours, a feat that made him a legend. However, the story doesn’t dwell on these achievements. Only glimpses of his success were shown in the opening scenes of the movie, which set the pace with special effects of battle scenes shot to suit Herculean might. Though the movie is set in Greek times, one can relate the story to on-going modern day conflicts among countries and in particular regions, as Lord Cotys is aggressively pursuing to expand his kingdom while Hercules and his men are preventing him from doing so. Ring any bells? It was Lord Cotys’ daughter, Ergenia (Rebecca Ferguson), who delivered his father’s message to Hercules. He did have a brief moment of romance with Ergenia, however, it was a decent attempt not to prolong the affair because the movie is about muscles, fights and an adrenaline rush that shows why Johnson is a rising action star. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="590"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] In the previous versions of Hercules, it was portrayed that in time of need, Hercules would call upon his father, Zeus, for help. The ruler of Mount Olympus would send his soldiers or would change the weather to beat the enemy to save Hercules. However, in this version, since the demigod son is human, he must therefore complete all the tasks on his own. This, however, adds spice to the story, as the viewer’s know that Hercules will be in action this time and not Zeus. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="600"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] Johnson began preparing for the role months before the shooting began. Although he was always in top shape because of his wrestling career and later turned into an action star, he needed to go an extra mile to turn himself into Hercules. According to Johnson, he trained himself in Budapest where he would begin his workouts at three in the morning. For nearly eight months, he followed a schedule of working out for hours in the gym, consuming a strong three course diet and shooting for the film that could go on for 12 hours. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="594"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] Ratner’s professional graph will take a giant leap for he has never done a movie based on a Greek character and his past projects belonged to the genre of fantasy, science fiction, comedy or drama. After directing X-Men: The Last Stand (2005), which wasn’t as big a success as the other movies of the X-Men franchise, Ratner was in pursuit of a movie that could establish his directorial skills, and Hercules certainly is his best work yet. It has catapulted both Ratner and Johnson’s careers to new heights. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="593"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] With a story as big as Hercules’, the running time of the movie is 98 minutes. Ratner and producers, Barry Levine and Beau Flynn have done a good job summing up the story with breath-taking action sequences within a time span of 100 minutes. The 3D effects bring action to life as Hercules’ weapons and his battles become prominent along with the special effects that are just what the viewers want to see. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="593"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] Even though the film has action and a smooth story, it seems as if the sword wielding scenes were honed down for some reason. The movie is adapted from the graphic novel of the same name and those who have read the novel must be wondering why similar graphic content wasn’t shown in its scenes. Being an avid fan of Johnson, this is perhaps my only criticism. Besides that, the movie is a good watch that would appeal more to male viewers for its testosterone-fuelled fights.

Since the early 20^th century, Hollywood has been persistently flourishing and progressing towards better and greater dimensions; shaping filmmaking trends for rest of the world’s leading film industries to follow. One of its achievements remains its ability to manage a global diversity of artists, producers, directors, technical teams, supporting staff and crew members, and how it enables all of them to render their services on the single platform of Hollywood. This film fraternity has produced a galaxy of legends and stars who have earned intriguing rewards in terms of name, fame, money, career, passion and self-attainment. The lustrous charm of this industry and the overall impact it establishes through the films ultimately enchants viewers globally. Articles by film critics are closely followed, and people love and cherish their favourite artists and their work, whether they hear about it through social media, TV or print. A tabulated chart at Twitter Counter unveils that out of world’s top 20 Twitter users (who have the highest numbers of followers), 13 are artists. Such facts show just how curious fans are and how much they like to be in touch with their favourite celebrities. Hollywood junkies always want to know what their favourite movie stars are up to, what they are working on, who they are dating, what they will wear at the red carpet and every personal detail that helps them connect better with the stars they see on screen. Hence, the Hollywood ship is sailing smoothly; so far so good. But how did things go wrong for a follower like me? Recently, I came across a news headline that not only infuriatingly flabbergasted me but also made me feel torturous paroxysm in my senses. I gazed at the headline which read:

“Hollywood studios blacklist Penelope Cruz over Gaza letter accusing Israel of genocide”.

“A panjandrum of the filmmaking industry can make or break a person’s Hollywood career”.

“Gaza is living through horror… while the international community does nothing”.

• One top producer, who has worked with Cruz, says he has privately vowed not to hire her again.
• Another top Hollywood executive also privately expressed his disapproval, saying he’s furious at Bardem and Cruz and he wasn’t sure about working with the couple again.
• Relativity Media’s chief executive, Ryan Kavanaugh, was the only studio head willing to go public with his views. He said,

These days, with an over abundance of clichéd romantic and post-apocalyptic dystopian movies, original films, like Horns, are a breath of fresh air. Based on the book of the same name by Stephen King’s son Joe Hill, Horns is a fantasy drama that tells the story of a man who suddenly grows a pair of horns after he is accused of his girlfriend’s murder. [embed width="620"]http://vimeo.com/105531423[/embed] The story is set in a small town, where the Harry Potter-famed Daniel Radcliffe’s character, Ig Perrish, has been accused of killing his girlfriend Merrin Williams (Juno Temple) by bashing her skull in. However, due to the absence of any concrete evidence, Ig hasn’t been charged with murder. The first few minutes of the movie establish that the citizens of the town vehemently hate him and compare him with the devil as they protest outside his house holding placards. There are even local news vans following him around town. Much like the other townies, Ig’s parents don’t seem too certain of their son’s innocence either. In fact, the only person who seems to believe in Ig is his friend Lee Tourneau (Max Minghella), who is also his lawyer. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="540"] Photo: Horns Official Facebook Page[/caption] One morning, after Ig wakes up from a night of his drunken debauchery, he finds two small horns protruding from his forehead. At first, he thinks he might be hallucinating, but he is soon proven wrong. Ig expects people to be scared, or at least surprised by the sudden change in his appearance, but almost everyone seems to take his devilish horns at a face value. Not only that – people begin to reveal their darkest, deepest, most sinister thoughts and secrets to him.  People also begin to ask him for his permission to act upon those thoughts, as if he is the devil. This bit is perhaps the most entertaining part of the entire movie (especially the news-crew fight scene). Ig relates his new influence over people to make them do or say things to his newly grown horns and sets out on a mission to find out Merrin’s real killer by using his horns. To know how he uses them, you’ll have to watch the movie. If we divide the movie into two parts, the first one could be described as an eccentric mix of dark humour and some really interesting twists. The second part of the movie is much faster in terms of pace, with completely unpredictable revelations, and is somewhat more sinister and dark than the first. It even includes a pitch fork! [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="540"] Photo: Horns Official Facebook Page[/caption] I have not read the book yet, but the movie has a very heavy religious undertone. There are quite a few references to Christianity used throughout the film. The movie strongly focuses on how the devil was once an angel and circles around other religious aspects. However, despite its demonic theme, this movie is much like a murder-mystery-cum-adult-fairytale. As far as the acting is concerned, Radcliffe has once again outdone himself. His performance, along with almost every other cast member, was quite brilliant throughout the movie. Even his American accent was up to perfection. Juno Temple, who only stars in flashbacks, also adapted a pretty impressive American accent. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="540"] Photo: Horns Official Facebook Page[/caption] However, the movie has some serious lows. It got quite dull in some parts and some of its scenes didn’t seem to fit in with the rest. The dullest parts of the movie were perhaps all the flashbacks. These flashbacks portrayed the beginning of Ig’s and Merrin’s relationship when they were young, and how they continued their relationship until the time of the girl’s death. These flashbacks were certainly very critical to the movie’s plot, but from a viewer’s point of view, they were much too prolonged, which was exhausting to watch. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="600"] Photo: Horns Official Facebook Page[/caption] Even though I liked the movie, I wouldn’t recommend others to watch it. It was quiet enjoyable at first; I got hooked as soon as the movie began, but somewhere down the road it got a bit absurd. It just felt like one of those movies that have too many strong components that just don’t seem to fit together. Until and unless you like such kind of films or you are a Radcliffe fan, I wouldn’t recommend this film to you. Horns was premiered at the 2013 Toronto International Film Festival and has received mixed reviews from critics. This movie exemplifies that great casting, brilliant acting, perfect cinematography and a strong screenplay can make an average movie look good – but it can never make it great. Alexander Aja, the director who has movies such as The Hills have Eyes and Mirrors on his resume, has certainly failed to deliver with his new movie.

While all of us have seen classic Hollywood, Bollywood and Lollywood blockbusters, many of us are unaware of a lot of amazing movies that have been directed by foreign film industries which are equally worthy of our attention. Therefore, I have come up with a list of 10 such foreign movies which I believe everyone should watch in order to appreciate cinematic finesse and art of other regions as well. Seven Samurai – Japan, 1954 [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="532"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] Akira Kurosawa is an auteur in the broadest sense. His work has influenced many people including the likes of Francis Ford Coppola, George Lucas and Martin Scorsese. In fact, Lucas has gone as far as to say that Kurosawa’s Hidden Fortress was his main source of inspiration for Star Wars. Seven Samurai is the embodiment of everything Kurosawa has been working on throughout his career, a film that combines the best elements of the samurai and western genres to make a stunning film that is epic in scale and ambition. The trailer for this movie can be seen here.  Life is Beautiful – Italy, 1997 [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="334"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] A film that is likely to make you laugh and cry at the same sitting, Life is Beautiful stays true to its title and gives you a truly beautiful film. Set in Italy during the World War II, the film follows the story of a Jewish man who tries his best to protect and sustain his son with the help of humour, after his family is taken to a Nazi concentration camp. Written, directed and starred by Roberto Benigni, who gives a masterful and convincing performance, Life is Beautiful is one of the most poignant films ever made as well as one of the best war movies. Its trailer can be seen here. A Separation – Iran, 2011 [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="475"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] Iranian cinema has produced some great films such as Ten, Taste of Cherry, and Children of Heaven, but nothing quite like A Separation. An excellent, suspense-filled Hitchcockian drama, this movie is impeccably well-crafted and actors have put forth a superb performance. A Separation is the personification of Iranian cinema and represents how a wonderful and complex screenplay can guide a film. [embed width="620"]https://vimeo.com/40670982[/embed] Oldboy – South Korea, 2004 [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="450"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] Very rarely does one see a film that operates on the same level as Oldboy. Brutal, violent, and shocking are just some of its qualities, and that is why Oldboy is one of the greatest revenge thrillers you are ever likely to see. The film has all the marquee violence synonymous to Asian cinema as well as a fantastic story. Chan-wook Park’s taut direction is instrumental in making this film great but this is a movie that thrives mainly on its wonderfully dark screenplay that keeps the audience interested at every turn. [embed width="620"]http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x15h3v_trailer-old-boy_shortfilms[/embed] Amores Perros – Mexico, 2000 [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="336"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] Before Alejandro Gonzalez’s Inarritu made it big in Hollywood with the likes of 21 Grams, Babel, and the most recent, Birdman, he directed Amores Perros, a film about a horrific car crash that interconnects three stories, each involving characters dealing with loss, regret and life’s harsh realities in Mexico City. Amores Perros is all in all an extremely intense and gritty film that provided us with the very first glimpses of Alejandro’s true talent and can probably be credited for launching his career. The trailer can be seen here. Bicycle Thief – Italy, 1948 [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="487"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] One of the greatest films of the neo-realist Italian era, Bicycle Thief has a simple plot yet it offers a fantastic cinematic experience. Set in Italy during the era of Post World War II, when the nation was in economic shambles, Bicycle Thief tells the story of a man and his son as they search for a stolen bicycle vital to their job. Bicycle Thieves is, without a doubt, one of the most powerful and moving films ever made and one of the high points in Italian cinema. Its trailer can be checked out here. City of God – Brazil, 2002 [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="400"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] City of God allows an unflinching look into the street life of Rio de Janeiro and the crime and poverty persistent over there. It focuses on how these aspects affect the lives of two young boys over a course of three decades. City of God’s biggest draw is the visceral nature of the film, its mix of wonderful storytelling and disturbing scenes that make the movie extremely compelling. [embed width="620"]http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xnd2z5_city-of-god-2002-official-trailer-hd_shortfilms[/embed] Downfall – Germany, 2004 [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="475"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] Downfall serves as a biopic to one of the most famous and controversial personalities in the history of the world, Adolf Hitler. The film offers a fascinating look into the last days of Hitler’s life as told by his secretary, Traudl Junge. It features a towering performance from Bruno Ganz as Hitler, who captures both the humane and inhumane sides of the Fuhrer perfectly. [embed width="620"]http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xqrs24_downfall_shortfilms[/embed] Hate – France, 1996 [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="354"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] An intimately persevering film about street life and racism in France, Hate is the story of three young men, an Arab, an African and a Jew, who spend an aimless day in a Paris suburb, as social turmoil swirls around them. How they eventually face confrontation with the police is the climax of the film. Trailer for the movie can be seen here.  8 1/2 – Italy, 1963 [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="507"] Photo: IMDb[/caption] Federico Fellini is regarded as one the greatest auteurs of world cinema. He was behind some of the most beautiful and original films ever made, such as La Strada and La Dolce Vita. However, 8 ½, is his crowning achievement. A film that served as an autobiographical account of the legendary film director, 8 ½ is a beautiful, complex, and meticulously constructed film and one of the greatest movies to emerge from Italian cinema. Trailer for the movie can be seen here. Art can be found in the most unconventional of places. It is always great to explore new industries and appreciate movies that are not part of the mainstream.

Dear Faisal Qureshi, Let me start by saying that while I am a film critic whose reviews are published weekly in Pakistan, I rarely watch Bollywood ‘films’. In fact, the last time I tried, my brain snapped shut, and I vomited uncontrollably for a few minutes. Later, I was diagnosed with Post Bollywood Stress Disorder (PBSD), a mental health condition provoked by a shockingly bad Bollywood film. I was sure I would never watch something as horrific again, until I saw your video response to Indian actor Saif Ali Khan’s comments on the Pakistani ban on his film, Phantom. [fbvideo link="https://www.facebook.com/qureshi.faisal/videos/vb.90055916454/10152932041031455/?type=2&theater"][/fbvideo] Now, I must admit, at the very least, you sparked my interest. After recovering from your video, thanks to a few pills of Imodium, I had a look at the trailer for Phantom. I do agree that this actioner looks like typical Bollywood nonsense where the ideas are recycled from counter-terrorism TV shows such as 24, and films such as Zero Dark Thirty, with the overall tone as subtle as a gorilla conducting a rectal exam. I also agree that Khan is naive to complain about Pakistan blocking his Citizen Kane when similar films of ours are banned in India. I believe films are an art form, and there is nothing artistic about a film which takes thematic decisions based purely on commercialism or patriotism. Meanwhile, Indian film critics have already ripped Phantom to shreds over its jingoism while the charity Medecins Sans Frontieres (MSF) is all set to sue the filmmakers for its dangerous portrayal of its workers. That being said, Qureshi, while some of your points can be appreciated, your video was even more offensive than the film you were targeting, which certainly takes special doing. This would be like being defeated by a fish in a tree climbing contest, or coming across as the real eccentric after a debate with Donald Trump, or losing to Kamran Akmal in a catching contest, and we know that the Akmal men couldn’t even catch a disease in the middle of an Ebola outbreak. In fact, let me take a few minutes to applause. I have never seen such a potent combination of misogyny, sexism, and misdirected saber rattling, packed into a 12-minute long video. It is as if Junaid Jamshed, Hamza Ali Abbasi, and Aamir Liaquat had a baby. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen the cartoon show Captain Planet, but I imagine these gentlemen held up their rings, combined their powers, and formed you. Your attempts to belittle Khan by repeatedly calling him ‘behan’ (sister) and ‘bachi’ (little girl) are so demeaning, I bet even Jamshed is sitting at home thinking,

“Dude, that’s a little sexist.”

“This nation knows how to deal with enemies, both foreign and domestic.”

There was a huge hoopla regarding the certification of Swaarangi in Pakistan. After initially being banned by the Central Board for Film Certification (CBFC), the film went on to get a Universal (U) certificate from the respective censor boards of Sindh and Punjab. This prompted the producers to appeal to the Information Ministry to form a separate independent panel that reconsidered the ban initiated by the CBFC. The ministry formed a six-member panel, compromising of independent individuals to review the film again, and after doing so, they cleared the film for release. As a result of which, Swaarangi will be released all over Pakistan. It is interesting to note that Swaarangi had to fight its way to the screens while Bilal Lashari’s Waar barely had to lift a finger. Where the blessings of the 18^th amendment lead to a more democratic form of censorship and certification as per the particular provinces, some of the holy cows still remain out of bounds. The film was released all across Pakistan with a Universal rating despite the use of foul language and graphic scenes. I wonder why such a decision was made, especially when all the censor boards comprise of members of film critics, educationists, artists, members of security agencies and other members of the civil society. On the contrary certain cinema owners have gone to the extent of checking the NIC’s before allowing audiences in the Emraan Hashmi starrer Raaz 3. The initial ban on Swaarangi was announced because the CBFC was concerned about the quality of the film and the image that it would project. https://twitter.com/falamb3/status/641086825256214529 https://twitter.com/falamb3/status/641088006112186369 The dust may have settled from the Swaarangi fiasco. The film has received the seal of approval and the matter has been put to rest. However, the whole process that the film went through has been quite revealing. Certain truths regarding the functioning of the censor boards have been unmasked. It is an eye-opener for all the film producers and general public at large that mistook CBFC’s initial ban for a final, unrelenting ban on the film. The Chairman of the Censor Board of Sindh feels that it is within his jurisdiction to dictate which film is of a high or low quality. The censor boards already have the final say in the release of films, have they adopted the role of critics too? The role of the censor boards has been clearly delineated and it does not involve shelling out judgement regarding films. In the next few years, these boards will be tackling many more complicated decisions regarding a lot more films. I have my fingers crossed that they will not err in judgment. CBFC is no longer the unanimous body that decides the fate of the film in Pakistan, and by that it doesn’t only mean the release of a film but also the version which will be released for public viewing.  Since the 18^th amendment was promulgated, all the provinces are supposed to have the film’s releasing in their respective territory certified on a provincial level. This is why CBFC’s authority today is restricted only to the Islamabad Capital Territory and the cinemas that come under the cantonments. Sorry, Islamabad. It is how it is. The Sindh Censor board is headed by the once-rapper Fakhre Alam, Punjab Censor Board is headed by Zeba Mohammad Ali, wife of the late actor Mohammad Ali and the CBFC is headed by the Mobashir Hasan. Balochistan and Khyber-Pakhtunkhwa are yet to form their own censor board which is why they rely on the certification of CBFC. This is also the reason many a times Pakistanis watch three different versions of the same film. I cannot stress on the absurdity of this. Three different versions for three different sections of the country. For those in Sindh, do you remember that scene from PK where people were performing Maatam? No? Punjab does. Hey Islamabad and Punjab, did you watch Sunny Leone’s Ragini MMS 3? No? Sindh did. And here is a sneak peak into why all of Pakistan did not get to watch Ragini MMS 3. The notes reproduced below are censor notes from the CBFC. Although the print is quite blurry, I assure you, you won't really need to squint to see what it says: [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="640"] Photo: Rafay Mahmood[/caption] Some films have to undergo a lot more hardship than Swaarangi when they do not receive a No Objection Certificate (NOC). Then the films have to go through another long process before they are actually submitted for certification anywhere. 1)      A local film importer, also known as a distributor, submits an application to the heritage wing of the information ministry requesting the import of the particular film. 2)      After receiving the application, the information ministry requests the CBFC for its comments on the film. 3)      CBFC confirms the synopsis of the film from seven to eight sources and informs the board if the there is anything controversial in the film; this could mean anything from being anti- Pakistan, anti-Islam to overtly violent. The CBFC then submits that “apparently there is nothing controversial about the film.” 4)      After getting these confirmations, the CBFC proposes that the information ministry give the NOC to the respective distributor. They propose it, they don’t recommend it. 5)      After this, the information ministry writes to the commerce ministry to give an NOC for the custom clearance of the film, subject to it being submitted to the CBFC. 6)      The film is imported and sent to the respective censor boards for certification and release. It is imperative for us to understand that our censor boards are essentially on the right track. Their actions may appear to be wayward; however, they have exhibited the will to rectify errors. When Bin Roye, a completely uncontroversial Pakistani film, was denied screening in Maharashtra, it was said that, in retaliation, the Pakistani industry would ban Bajrangi Bhaijaan. It was then that the censor board took a stand, for the greater good, and decided against banning the Indian film despite any angst the industry may have had. This shows that Pakistan’s censor boards today are quite astute and have shed the prejudices of yesterday. While the method adopted may very well be trial and error, it would be naïve, and maybe even ignorant, to think that our board has not matured in the process. For the rest of us out there, before we make a judgement call, we have to let the process take its natural course. And maybe, just maybe, have a little faith in the capability of our own censor board.

Akshay Kumar is one of the most loved and sought after celebrity in Bollywood and this is why his movies do exceptionally well at the box office, irrespective of their script, subject, direction and content. Kumar paired with Prabhu Deva is a lethal combination, substantiated by 2012’s block buster Rowdy Rathore. This is why the audiences were desperately waiting for the Kumar starrer Singh is Bliing. [embed width="620"]http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x327onh_singh-is-bliing-hd-hindi-movie-trailer-2015-akshay-kumar_shortfilms[/embed] Kumar’s fans wondered if Singh is Bliing will be a blockbuster at the box office like his previous films? But will this movie be as entertaining as his previous endeavours? [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="600"] Photo: Singh is Bliing Facebook page[/caption] If you are too big of a Kumar fan, caution is advised before reading further, because even Kumar couldn't save Singh Is Bliing from doom. Singh is Bliing is about Raftaar Singh (Kumar) who lives in Bassi Patna, Punjab. Raftaar has a nonchalant attitude towards life but has a heart of gold. Raftaar’s father gives him two options; either marry his friend’s daughter, an overweight Sweety or work under his friend’s supervision in Goa. Raftaar picks the second option and leaves for Goa, where he meets Sara (Amy Jackson), daughter of a ‘mafia king’. Mark (Kay Kay Menon), a deranged thug, is thirsty of vengeance from Sara for she offended him in the past. The rest of the movie is hoopla of these very circumstances. No brownie points for guessing what happens along the way, can’t be called a Bollywood movie without a typical love story, can it? Insanity prevails throughout the movie without an ounce of innovation, except Kumar’s energetic Bhangra moves, of course. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="600"] Singh is Bliing Facebook page[/caption] [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="508"] Photo: Singh is Bliing Facebook page[/caption] Amy Jackson doesn’t have dialogues in Hindi, none at all, but she manages to leave a mark. Her action sequences are very well executed. Lara Dutta plays a small role in the film, but looks breath taking in every shot, even in ghastly outfits. Menon is one of the finest talents in Bollywood but he is literally wasted in Singh is Bliing, the same way he was wasted in Drona. After Haider and Rahasya, this performance was a major let down from Menon. Don’t know if we should blame Menon or the script for it. The 54-year-old Rati Agnihotri plays Kumar’s mother’s role in the film and does justice to her role. Kareena Kapoor, Prabhu Deva and Sunny Leone are seen in cameo performances. Singh is Bliing is amongst those movies whose performance, script and logic don’t make any sense and perhaps are also not needed. Why? Because it’s supposed to be brainless comedy. Kumar performs all the absurd activities suavely, which is why the audience watches it despite its idiocy. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="600"] Singh Is Bliing Facebook page[/caption] Prabhu Deva’s previous release was Action Jackson, which didn’t do well at the box office either. If Deva wants to keep making such senseless movies, he can perhaps cast only big stars, as only star-power can (perhaps) save such ridiculous movies from drowning. I was hoping may be the music of the film can help it from drowning but its not applause-worthy either, even though it suits the genre of the film. Singh Is Bliing is an attempt at slapstick humour and glorifying Singh-ness, but fails miserably. Those who are thinking it would be something similar or close to Singh is King – please refrain. The movie might just do well with the masses who don’t intend to exercise a single brain muscle. Those who intend to apply logic while watching movies, don’t bother. I would rate Singh Is Bliing 1.5 out of five.